Now I know what Ke$ha meant

I woke up this morning and I must say... I felt a little like P. Diddy.

Creme brûlée

Is a close second to cream puffs. I bet in heaven they serve cream puffs and creme brûlée. Mmm

Well the paternity tests are in

and Darth Vader... you are the father

You know what really grinds my gears? (12)

The song Take Me Out To The Ball Game. News flash. You're already at the ball game. You can't tell someone to bring you to a place you're already at. It's like proposing to your wife of 10 years. It's already happened.

It's almost 3am

and I cannot fall asleep. Maybe it's the caffeine I had or maybe I just have insomnia. Or maybe I'm completely lying and I'm up watching TV because my favorite episodes of iCarly came on. You never know.

You know what really grinds my gears? (11)

When people say "how about them apples?" what apples are you talking about? The aforementioned fruit is completely irrelevant from our current conversation. And I prefer pears

I love gift cards

I had a 25 dollar gift card but there was nothing I wanted at Target and I didn't wanna walk out empty handed so I bought another 25 dollar gift card with my 25 dollar gift card. Out with the old in with the new